The satire below from the Babylon Bee is even funnier when you’re an older gentleman, as this shitposting writer is. If you can’t laugh at yourself and one’s station in life, it would be bad manners to laugh at anyone else, an activity that I spend the majority of my days doing….laughing at myself, and of course, others….a lot!
***
Senators Excited Thursday’s Lunch Will Now Include Pudding With Their Strained Peas – babylonbee.com
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Members of the Upper House shuffled excitedly down the hall on their way to lunch Thursday after hearing Congressional chefs were prepping something special in addition to their usual meal of strained peas and blended cube steak.
“Oooo! I hear it’s chocolate pudding!” exclaimed Senator Dianne Feinstein. “I haven’t had chocolate smooshsmosh since Otto von Bismarck made his trek across the Delaware and another thing why are the lights in here so bright and where’s Dorothy with my whacking stick….”
Senator Mitch McConnell was seen padding toward the cafeteria with a sparkle in his eye after hearing about the addition to the meal, which interns call a “big deal” for the aging senators who look forward to little added treats to their standard lunches.
“I sure do love…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….. pudding.” Senator McConnell told reporters.
Following lunch, the Senators were entertained by Clarence Wilson and the Do-Wops, a favorite old-timey musical ensemble, before aides helped them back to their offices for afternoon nap-time.
“It warms the heart to see them so excited,” Aide Bethany Simpson said. “At their age, it’s the little things that make them so happy. It’s like watching the world through the eyes of a child…a child who can make laws and determine the direction of the country.”
***
***
Today’s musical offering:
Aram Khachaturian – Waltz from Masquerade -Symphony Orchestra of the Arthur Rubinstein Music School in Bydgoszcz, Poland
(volume cranked and maybe find someone to dance with…or just dance by yourself, or as in my case, imagine those times from long ago when you could dance 😉 )
Dispatches from the Asylum 